Finding beauty

By Abbi Bates

Birmati perches on her faded red, woven stool in a field of carrots, radishes, cauliflower, chives and peppers. Nothing different. Nothing new. She prepares vegetables for her husband to sell on the street in the afternoons. Day by day, she keeps her head down with a knife in hand and continues to play her role for farmers’ pay. Behind the determination on her face, she thinks every day about both her daughters who are no longer with her. She is persistent, powerful, welcoming and determined. She is a symbol of what India has presented to me in the last month.

India is filled with beauty. Its colors, its people, its agriculture. The India we saw is not afraid of the challenges it faces — or at least its people don’t wear it on their shawls. There are so many battles India faces: complicated family situations, poverty, misogyny, abuse, rape, disease, food and water insecurity, discriminatory educational systems, castes — I could go on. Yet if I sit here and talk about the hardships India faces without displaying the other side, I would fail to proclaim the admiration, aspiration and love these people bring to their lives and others’ lives. India’s people are pure-hearted, caring and go-getters.

People are beautiful and loving in their own way — despite what they face, what they look like, what language they speak, what gender they are, what hierarchy they fall into or what their marital status is. India has proven that.

When my dad was arrested for domestic abuse, I began to see the blessings in my life more easily. At the time, I needed to be there for my family, to be strong. And I wouldn’t change that. I learned so much about myself, God and the world through that experience. I have had many influential people in my life who allowed me to grow into the woman I am today. And some of those people are in India. One of those people is Birmati.

I find that people in India have a similar mindset to me. Instead of complaining about what they are facing or what they don’t have, they find ways to enjoy the moment and be grateful for what and who they do have.

I have found people will fail me in my life and hardships will come — that’s out of my control. How I respond to those hardships is in my control. But there are good people in this world who will love and support me. It’s up to me to determine whether I want to move past my hardships and accept the blessings God is placing in front of me — people and experiences. It’s hard to decline those when they love the way they do, through endless chai and meals, giving of scarves and open, real conversations.

I promise my future self to think of the beauty and workmanship of India above the challenges to get through the battles I am guaranteed to face. I promise my future self to be reminded of the grit and work ethic I know is possible from being around India’s people. I promise my future self experiences of joy, laughter and peace with astonishing people as this country does best. I promise never to forget the three weeks I spent in India and all that it gave me — especially the way Birmati loves those around her and displays God’s image in every way.